Creativity Adapting

No question about it, coronavirus has left me feeling like this is my writing career…

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Image courtesy of Pixabay

Way back in January, I had hopes of publishing my first novel in time for the summer reading season.  Even before the pandemic-shutdown-of-everything in March, I was behind on that schedule and struggling with editing The Compass Code, for various reasons.  After the pandemic-shutdown, it felt like everything came to a screeching halt and was suspended in uncertainty.  Including my ability to focus and create.

After a few months, I was ready to give up on the train wreck.  Ready to take the easy way out…

novel burning
Image courtesy of Pixabay

I stopped thinking about it.  Stopped thinking about characters and plot lines, back stories and threads that need tying up.  Mostly.  Well, I mean, I tried, anyway.  But these people I created and have spent so much time playing make believe with just won’t go quietly away into oblivion.

I could burn the papers that hold the words that are their lives, but that won’t sear them, or their stories, from my mind.  I made them, I’m stuck with them.  At least until I can unleash them all on you, dear readers.

So, over the past few days, the irresistible urge has finally boiled over and I’ve sat back down with my laptop and my notebooks and all the words I’ve been neglecting.  I can no longer evade the work using the excuse that I’m just doing my best to get through this pandemic-shutdown-of-everything.

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It’s nearly August.  COVID-19 cases are on the rise again and it looks increasingly unlikely schools will reopen in September.  My life isn’t going back to the old normal anytime soon.  I’ve got to adapt and carve out time from this hectic new normal in order get this train back on track.

There’s no question, it feels good to reunite with my imaginary friends.

 

Making a Book in Grown Up Land

I have been telling stories as long as I can remember.  As a kid, when I wrote a story, I wasn’t content to simply write my words on a piece of paper.  I would staple pages together and write my story in these handmade books, complete with illustrations and hand drawn covers.

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Some gems from early in my career.

I wish it was so easy to make a book in grown-up land.

Almost from the time I began writing The Compass Code, I planned to self-publish it.  The primary reason I decided on this route is that I like owning what I create.  I own the words.  I own the art.  I like having the freedom to do what I choose with it.  So, as I considered my options, self-publishing felt like the best fit.

Of course, self-publishing means–surprise–my job doesn’t end with writing the words.  I have to turn those words into an actual book.  Properly formatted, with things like headers and page numbers and a table of contents.  And a cover.

This has terrified me.  I can write the words, but formatting a document on a computer?  I was lost at the word format.  I have some skills with a pencil, but graphic design?  As in, art on a computer?  Did I mention how computer challenged I am?

Last month, I had the good fortune to take a class on formatting manuscripts into ebooks and paperbacks, and designing a cover using the free software GIMP.  I still have a lot of work and learning to do, both with formatting the manuscript and with my cover design, but for the first time, I feel as though I just might be able to actually make a real, not-stapled-together, grown-up book.

There will still be some hand drawn art on the cover though.  Because tradition.

Many in the industry say over and over again that authors shouldn’t make their own covers.  It won’t look professional.  It will look self-published.  (Oh the shame.)  People won’t buy your book.  I can appreciate the advice.  But, I have contrarian tendencies.  And remember, I want to own it all, the words, the art…

I drew the images I envisioned for my cover years ago.  I tried different configurations, colors, fonts, etc.  It was a lot of fun, and I did succeed in making an image I like enough to use for headers on social media.  But I knew it wouldn’t translate into a professional looking cover without help.  I filed all the art away and packed up the pencils and got back to writing.

The class gave me a reason to pull all the drawings back out and art to my heart’s content for a couple of weeks.

Figuring out how to turn my pencil drawings into an amazing cover I love using GIMP was extremely frustrating in the beginning.  (Could be my afore mentioned computer illiteracy.)  As I played around with it (subjected myself to much mental anguish) for entirely too much time, I finally managed to make some sense of GIMP, and it turns out, it’s pretty fun.

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Image courtesy of Pixabay

After days of dangerously elevated stress levels, hours of raging, and a little bit of swearing (okay, a lot), The Compass Code has a cover design concept. And I’m really, really excited about it.  I can’t wait to share it, along with all the words it will soon be wrapped around.

Now, if I can just get through the formatting part…

On Snail Time

An old housemate of mine told me this joke once.  He found it hysterical.  He laughed and laughed.  This was years ago, and the exact details are a bit fuzzy.  Now, it’s true, the funniest thing about the joke was my housemate telling it.  But, I still appreciated the joke.

It went something like this:  dude’s hanging out watching TV when there’s a knock on the door.  He goes and opens it, and there’s no one there.  He grumbles and returns to the TV, only to hear another knock.  This time, he whips the door open and looks all around.  There’s no one there, but, he spots a snail on the door step.  He’s angry now, so he picks the snail up and throws it.  A week later, dude’s watching TV again and there’s a knock on the door.  He goes and opens the door–there’s no one there.  But this little voice says, “what was that for?”  Dude looks down to find a snail on the door step again.

I know, I know, eyes are rolling.  Snails can’t knock on doors.  Or talk.  But, hey, river guides always need family-friendly jokes to tell.  I mean, it ain’t all whitewater and action out there.  There’s miles of flatwater, an ever-present upstream wind, and people trapped on a boat expecting a show.  So yeah, lame jokes can serve a purpose.

Anyway, back to the point.  In all seriousness.  Seriously.  It took the snail an entire week to get back to the door!  That’s probably like, three decades in snail-time.  His shell was probably cracked too.  And that is exactly how I am feeling about writing my novel right now.

I ooze along at a snail’s pace, make it to the door and knock, only to be thrown for a loop.  As in, I find I need to write about something I don’t know, and so I have to spend another snail’s week researching so I can write about it.  Or, I fix a plot problem, only to find that the fix breaks another part of the plot, and there goes another snail’s week.  This has been a disheartening cycle.

But, I’m not writing this to whine about or make excuses for my lack of a publication-ready draft.  As I’ve made this snail-paced journey I’ve come to realize that my story is worth taking the time needed to get it right.  I’ve heard writers say that nobody writes a good first novel, and if you really love your story, you should save it.  Tell it after you’ve got a few published novels under your belt.  Get the bad writing out of the way, then write the story you love so you can do it justice.

That’s ridiculous.

I say, write the story you love every time.  And give it the time it takes to get it right, to make it good.  Learn the stuff you don’t know, even if it takes months of research.  The story is worth it.

I have to remind myself not to rush, and not to get discouraged.  I have to trust The Compass Code will be a better story for all my snail’s weeks lost to research and plot problems.  Because I really do love the story.

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Featured image courtesy of Pixabay

Snow Days, Deadlines, and Editing Madness

Last week, it snowed.  A lot.  Winter finally decided to really make an appearance.  Which is awesome.  I love the snow and we certainly need the water.  But, all that snow isn’t great for getting any editing and writing done.

Schools were closed for four days, and the smallish bi-pedal beings (and the one that is now taller than me!) were stuck at home.  And I can’t seem to get much work done when I don’t have the space to myself.

We survived being home bound and school went back to normal this week.  In order to get my head back in the game, I committed to another deadline.  It’s still got some holes, but I’ll be sending The Compass Code, draft three, to a couple of beta readers this weekend.   Which is exciting, but extremely nerve-wracking too.

In order to get the draft ready to share, I’ve been editing like mad.  I’ve also given a lot of time to learning different techniques for self-editing and improving my craft.  Much to my surprise, this has been a lot of fun.  Maybe after all these years with this project, I’ve just gone mad.

If so, it’s worth it.  I think.

Anyway, in my quest to polish my writing, I stumbled across a couple really helpful podcasts I want to share.  They are The Book Editor Show and The Writership Podcast.  If you’re looking for some great tips on editing your own work, check them out.

And so, back to the editing madness I go.

Happy Hal-idays!

It looks like I’ll have a white Christmas tomorrow as snow fell hard today, covering the dirt piles, rebar, and concrete blankets in our construction-zone yard.  It hasn’t felt like Christmas here yet as we haven’t had a tree up until today and very few decorations out.  This December has been even busier than usual, but the snow brought with it a peace and calm, and finally, finally, I feel ready for tomorrow.  But, once again, I didn’t plan ahead to prepare any sort of holiday post full of cheer and goodwill.  Of course, I don’t usually write much cheer and goodwill, that doesn’t quite fit the genre.

War, torture, assassinations, arms trafficking, organized crime, child abuse:  these are the dark, difficult subjects I usually write about.  I write about them because it gives voice to the anger they fuel in me.  But spending so much time steeped in research and writing about such things requires that I also nurture a healthy sense of humor for the sake of my sanity.

My favorite writing buddies, my sisters, help me out with that a lot.  Awhile back, we got started laughing over a name.  I asked them to help me name a character in my novel who is an actor playing a detective in a hot new prime time cop show, and one of the first suggestions was Hal.  Which really made me laugh.  It also resulted in a series of back-and-forth messages between me and my sisters, heckling each other and cracking puns using the name Hal.  In the end, the challenge was made to name a character Hal in each of our works in progress.  (Yes, there is now a Hal in The Compass Code, but I doubt every reader will find him.)

This challenge resulted in me writing a silly scene that has no place in my novel, but does involve some of my characters.  I call it The Hal Scene.  I don’t generally find it useful to utilize writing exercises or prompts to write scenes that will never be part of my novel or it’s immense back story.  I’ve always found that to be a frustrating endeavor.  It feels like wasted time to me.  I want to write what I’m going to use.  But, once in a while, I’ll get an inspiration, and I just have to “waste” the time it takes to put the words down on the page.  The Hal scene is one such moment.

Since it’s Christmas, and because I’m well into a third draft of The Compass Code (with chapters!), and because I’ve never shared any of my fictional work outside of a small group of people and I have to get over the fear, I’ve decided to share The Hal Scene with my readers.  Just for fun.

I have to warn though, this scene does not reflect the tone of The Compass Code at all.  I didn’t write this scene with any intention of ever plugging it into the novel.  I wrote it to make myself and my sisters laugh.  So, dear readers of this post, please don’t expect so much humor from my novel, because the novel really is about war, assassinations, torture, etc.

It’s said that laughter is the best medicine, and I believe it.  So, I hope this silly scene brings some smiles and laughs to my readers this holiday season.  May the Christmas holiday and the New Year bring you much laughter, joy and peace.

So, without further ado…

(Except, please note, this post contains adult language.)

The Hal Scene

              Seth Miller burst into the barracks whooping and yelling, startling everyone awake.  It was so early it was still dark outside and several of the men threw pillows at him as he danced a jig between the bunks.

“What the fuck is wrong with you, man?  You wasted?”  Turner growled.

“It’s a boy!” Seth yelled.  “I knew it.  It’s a boy!”

With that, none of them could resist his unbridled joy and he ran around the room giving high fives and fist bumps while they all congratulated him.  Bulldog jumped from his bunk and grabbed Seth into a bear hug.

“That’s great, man,” he said as he released Seth.  “You guys are so blessed.”

Jack offered his fist, and Seth cracked his own against it.  Turner rolled out of his bunk grudgingly, and put an arm around Seth’s shoulders while clapping him on the back.

“Way to go, Daddy-o.”

Since they would have to be up shortly anyway, they got dressed and ready for their morning run.  When the men found Lt Davies and Sgt Rodriguez, Seth shared his news again.  His excitement energized the team as they took off running.

“You guys name him yet?” Bulldog asked.

“We haven’t talked about names yet.”

“What?  Man, you gotta think about this now.  This is a huge responsibility, dude.  This kid’s gotta live his entire life with whatever you pick!”

“Shit, man, this is too much responsibility for Lite-beer here,” Turner said.  “We better come up with something to help him out.”

“Name him Tyler,” Lt Davies called out.  “It’s a good, strong name.”

“No way.  If you’re gonna name him after the L-tee, name him Davy,” Rodriguez suggested.  “Now that’s a good strong name, like Davy Crockett.”

“Nah, name him Phil,” Turner said.

“Dude, are you kidding me?”  Rodriguez shot back.  “Juan.  Now that’s a name.”

“Call him Jaime,” Jack said.  “Jaime will love it.”

The suggestions kept coming as they finished their run in the growing morning light.  When they hit the range, they didn’t stop, each trying to out-do the others as they took turns pulling the trigger.

“How ’bout Clint?” Turner asked as he squeezed his trigger.

“Edward.”

“Robert.”

“Lance.”

Down the line it went until it was Bulldog’s turn to take aim.  Everyone waited with anticipation as he had yet to suggest a single name.  He savored the moment, taking a couple deep breaths before easing the trigger back.  The bullet pinged against the target and Bulldog turned to the group with a triumphant smile.

“Hal,” he said.

“What?” they all cried.

“What the Hal kind of name is that, man?”

“Oh, Hal no!”

“What?  It’s a great name,” Bulldog protested in a serious tone.  “It’s short for Harold, man.  Means power, a leader, a ruler.  Dude, come on!”

They were all silent for a moment, staring at Bulldog with surprise at his earnest expression, before bursting with peals of laughter.

“You need Hal-p, man.”

“It was my Grandpa’s name.  He was one tough dude.”

“No doubt.  With a name like that, he’d have to be.”

“Yeah, y’all are real funny,” Bulldog grumbled.

“Hal-arious,” Jack said, a sly grin on his face, before pulling the trigger.

*******

Happy Hal-idays!

Wait…What Chapters?

I’ve read many, many books.  All sorts of books.  Nonfiction, text books, novels from a huge variety of genres…and almost all of those books had one thing in common.  Chapters.  As I am finally approaching The End for The Compass Code, the idea of chapters is weighing heavily on my mind, because my novel doesn’t currently have any.

[chap-ter]

noun

  1. a main division of a book, treatise, or the like, usually bearing a number or a title.

Another November has come and gone.  I avoided NanoWrimo again this year, but I didn’t avoid writing.  My kids and I made a wager that if I didn’t finish a second draft of The Compass Code, they would get to choose the dinner menu for a week.  Think ice cream and bad pizza for seven days straight.  Gross.  So, I was motivated.

I made a list of over 30 missing scenes.  I wrote the last missing scene from the list on November 30th.  It took just over 36 minutes to print the 540 pages of a PDF of my second draft.  It took six years and the threat of a week of ice cream and bad pizza for dinner for me to finally figure out how to finish a novel.  Now, I have to figure out how to make it look like a novel—with chapters.

I like making lists.  I like making timelines for my characters.  I like writing down ideas and connecting them to each other with lines.  It’s fun to play around with my writing in visual ways.  But outlining?  Oh, heck no!  That’s work, not fun.  That’s organizing, not playing around with ideas.

Breaking this novel into chapters feels like outlining.  It feels like an impossible task.  It’s work, and it’s hard.  Bleh.  I know I’m not going to get it right the first time.  (Yay for beta readers!)  But somehow, I’ve got to find those chapters.

I have a lot of short scenes following multiple narratives in the beginning of the book and I’m struggling to decide how to organize them so they don’t get confusing.  Add to that, I’ve never even thought about the average length of chapters, or how many there should be, or how many scenes should be in a chapter… just how does one take all of the little pieces and construct a novel?

I found some helpful resources online, like this one.  I read through the entire draft and tried to visualize chapter breaks.  I set up a new draft project in Scrivener, and created the first three chapters, hoping to provoke some optimistic inspiration.   I’m still feeling intimidated.  But, this story has come too far to give up now.  So, it’s on to draft three—and the very epic struggle to create chapters.

I guess I need to figure out what sort of wager with the kids will help me get through another round of editing by the end of December!

It’s Red Pen Time

I’m nearly a month behind schedule.  But, I printed a draft of The Compass Code yesterday, and I’m ready to dive into editing it.  It needs a LOT of work.  There are several plot lines that still need tying up in order to bring all the action together at the end of the book.  That is, if I want it to make any sense, anyway.

Even though I know it’s still a mess inside, I think all 345 pages are the most beautiful things I’ve ever held in my hands (well, except for the smallish bipedal beings, but it’s been a long time since they fit in my hands).  I’m sure I’ll change my mind about that in the coming days and weeks.

Today I’m just going to bask in satisfaction while sitting here next to my novel.  I’ll be back at it tomorrow, armed with highlighters, a red pen, post-it notes, and inspiration.  And coffee.

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Me for the next few weeks, as depicted (lovingly, I’m sure) by the smallish bipedal beings.

Reality Keeps Stealing My Fiction

army-2991940_1920On March 16, 2018, Buzzfeed News reported that the Central Intelligence Agency is “deploying small teams of commandos to kill selected suspected terrorists, according to two sources familiar with the program.”  The CIA has denied this, claiming the story is wrong.

(Spoiler alert)  I’ve been writing fiction about this for quite some time. This article could almost be something of an outline for a big part of my novel.

I’ve said before that I’ve been kicking myself for not having finished this novel a year ago every time I see the news these days.  This is yet another news story that seriously lights a fire under me.  While this month has gotten unexpectedly busier than normal, I’m still pushing for my March 31st deadline for a finished draft of The Compass Code.

Once the draft is complete, I’ll be releasing a teaser from a scene that involves my own assassin team.  It’s exciting to see progress, to see the story coming together, and I’m getting anxious to share it.

 

Image courtesy of Pixabay.

Deadline Time

I’ve spent so much time wrapped up in my imaginary world lately and it’s really hard to switch back and deal with reality.  I just want to stay in my imagination 24/7 till I get this book done.  It would be nice if I could just hole up in an isolated cabin somewhere for a couple of weeks of uninterrupted writing.  Sadly, that’s not an option.

All this straining of my brain to make stuff up has left my blog world a bit neglected and quiet lately.  So, I figured a short update was warranted.  I’m still writing.  After the big snip, my draft has recovered back up to a little over 72K words.  My characters are wreaking havoc and plotting evil deeds.  Exciting times.

And so…

It’s also deadline time.  I’ve been kicking myself every time I see the news lately for not having finished this novel a year ago.  Since all that self-kicking is exhausting, I have finally decided to force a deadline upon myself.  I’m not sure I’ll make it, and if I do, the result will be beyond rough.  It’ll still need a lot of work.  But, I’m gonna try to find my way to The End for The Compass Code by March 31st.

Hold me to it.

Goals

It’s that time again when people start talking about goals, and resolutions for the new year.  I’m not really a New Year’s resolution sort of person but I always have aspirations.  I’ve never really felt the need to write about them, I figure my goals don’t matter to anyone but me.  But this year, I’ve decided to write about them in hopes it will be an added push to achieve them.  (And because one goal is to write every day, and this was an easy thing to write about, hahaha).

Goals.  I’ve got some.  A lot, actually.  And some of them even involve my writing career.  2018 might just be the year I accomplish some of the bigger, more important ones.  That is an exciting, but also intimidating, possibility.  It isn’t going to be easy.

It’s possible that one non-writing goal will result in a lot of disruption in my routine over the course of this year as the family embarks (hopefully) on some significant home improvement projects.  However, I’m determined to keep a strong focus on writing daily no matter how chaotic it gets around here.

I’ve said it for a few years (I know, I know, who’s gonna believe me now?), but this is the year I will finish The Compass Code.  It’s nearly time to start hunting for a beta reader or two, and an editor.  Along with finishing it and getting it (and myself) ready for its debut, I’ve got a lot to learn about self-publishing.  And, I need to work on that oh-so-important blurb for the book, a task I’m dreading.  Oh yeah, and that cover design, and…and….  The entire process of self-publishing often feels so overwhelming.  I sometimes suspect I procrastinate on finishing the novel to avoid all of it!  But no more.  Watch for a few teasers and “deleted scenes” that I’ll be posting here soon.

Another goal is to get my little orange van back on the road.  Yes, this is actually a writing related goal.  She plays a starring role in my other, mostly finished novel, and I need a photo for the book cover.  I’ve got a location in mind for the photo shoot, and it’s not the back yard. That means a road trip!  So, she needs some tires, and some other, engine-ey sort of things.  Don’t get me wrong, the van runs, or she did, many years ago when she went into semi-retirement.  Marmie’s never let me down though, so I have faith.  Along with her journey onto the road again, I plan to spend some time on Volkswagen Summer this year, and hopefully get it ready for publishing as well.  (If you want to follow my little orange van’s progress, find me on Instagram.  I tag pictures of the van with #Marmie, #littleorangevan, and #VWsummer).

I have long wanted to commit to a set number of blog posts published each month on Seeking Redress and on here.  I’m still hesitant to do so though, since Compass and VW Summer are my biggest writing priorities.  I don’t know if it will happen this year, but I’m going to try.

I’m excited to dive into 2018.  There is no way to know what the world has in store for us this year, and I watch events unfold with some unease.  But, in my own small part of the world, I intend to do what I can to make it a better place.  Happy New Year everyone, and here’s to accomplishing our goals!

 

Image courtesy of pixabay.com

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